I am sad to report I have to deliver my first zero star review* (yup, an asterisk). It is not often I feel the need to put on a collared shirt to go on an Italian beef expedition. Maggianos is a restaurant that has served former President of the United States Bill Clinton. I figured avoiding a t-shirt would be for the best. I was even surprised that an upscale restaurant that plays Frank Sinatra and Tony Bennett would even have an Italian Beef sandwich. Regardless, I had to plan my trip in advance. Maggianos only serves their Italian beef for lunch, so putting on a dress shirt for lunch seemed worth the effort.
Maggianos inhabits the location of a former Dick Clarks cafe Americana. Like a hermit crab that crawled inside a shell, it took over and made that shell its home. It is in a very impressive location. The Fashion Mall at Keystone at the Crossing is a high rent place to be. Across the street are 2 high-end jewelry shops. There is a theme of high-end money everywhere. I was greeted and shown to my table. I tripped over the tablecloth. Yes, it is a place that serves Italian beef and actually has tablecloths. I thought to myself, Wow, this place must have a great beef! The waiter, a very nice gentleman named Larry, came to my table, asked what I wanted to drink, and went to go get my Sprite with no ice. Upon his return, he asked if I knew what I wanted and I proudly ordered the Italian beef. Imagine my chagrin when he said, Sorry, were out of Italian beef. How in the world can any place this nice be out of anything? Being a very good server, he went back to the kitchen to verify, but the news upon his return was not very good. He explained that there was apparently some sort of shortage at either the warehouse or distribution center and there was no Italian beef to be had. This begs the question, why, in a place as nice as this, do they not have the ability to make their own Italian beef? There are cows across Indiana that put their life on the line to give us tasty, tasty Italian beef. Does a place as nice as this not have a chef? Is the formula for Italian beef locked in a vault that makes it impossible to recreate? The price they charge for Italian beef is $10.75. For that
He explained that there was apparently some sort of shortage at either the warehouse or distribution center and there was no Italian beef to be had. This begs the question, why, in a place as nice as this, do they not have the ability to make their own Italian beef? There are cows across Indiana that put their life on the line to give us tasty, tasty Italian beef. Does a place as nice as this not have a chef? Is the formula for Italian beef locked in a vault that makes it impossible to recreate? The price they charge for Italian beef is $10.75. For that price, they could drive down the street, buy Italian beef from Famous Steak & Lemonade and tell me it was theirs.
I’ve been to other less pricey restaurants where, when they run out of an item, go to a nearby store, buy replacements, and make it.
*-Regardless, this is why a very fancy restaurant gets a zero out of five stars. They simply had no Italian beef because they had a bad excuse.
– Anthony Macabre Lillig
